Updated: Aug 4, 2018
When you hear kids, not just one, but more than one telling you "Your hair is ugly!" or “My hair is gold and yours is just brown”, you can’t help but to feel like you are average, because don’t kids tell the ‘truth’ all the time? It was nothing short of the fact that I was bleaching and destroying my hair, and what once appeared as healthy, beautiful silky and shiny chocolate hair turned to brittle, frizzy and damaged hair with no shine what so ever. The fact was that I didn’t know how to properly care for bleached hair in a humid environment. But instead I resorted to self hate. And sometimes our thoughts can become somewhat irrational when kids, even your own mother start telling you that your hair looks like a train wreck.
On the other hand, you also have to deal with self-esteem issues with the opposite sex, especially when you find that boy you like in class dating a blonde or some red-haired chick. Or, if you ever were in a relationship it's The Irrational Thoughts A Brunette Has When Her Ex Starts Dating A Blonde.
This only made me even more curious as to how to stand out, as we all are at times. Many women who have experienced the ‘not feeling unique’ scenario resort to dying and bleaching their hair and working hard to change their looks. And since my mother would never let me dye my hair, this only made me feel worse, which resulted into an ever more revolt for my right to have my hair the way I wanted it. I thought about sneaking a bottle of something to get it done myself anyway, but the I feared the consequences. So I never did it.
And as a pre-teen this was really crucial to me. And I really thought of this even more. To think of it, dying my hair wasn’t going to make me feel better either, because if I wanted it the color of gold or firey red, I’d want it to be natural. And people will know the difference as my roots begin to show within a couple of days, so what’s the use?
Yet, after seeing some fairly attractive people who were brunettes (both men and women), and getting to know some of them, in particularly my first crush; I began to think twice about the disappointment. Just because brunettes vastly outnumber their recessive counterparts, can this truly mean that brunettes can’t be unique?
This is why I made an important decision in life, to stop comparing myself to others and learn to love what I saw in the mirror, because I wasn’t getting it any other way. I made a life-changing list of all of the reasons why I shouldn't be jealous of anyone! Self hate is a choice. Learning to love yourself and your traits is also a choice. Which will you choose? Here are some reasons I wrote down on why I should love my dark hair.
My chocolate brown locks could be truly beautiful if it's properly cared for, especially with that serious shine in the sun. All it take is the proper care.
There are many attractive and beautiful women with dark hair, as well as any other hair type. It’s unfair to generalize everyone with certain hair color as having a certain type of charisma.
Just because brown hair isn't rare doesn't mean brunettes aren't extraordinary people. It also does not mean that brunettes can’t be beautiful and stand out. And that is the truth.
There is no hair color that is better than the next. But if you're one of those women who think so then the problem lies with you and your ego. Not your hair color.
The List Goes on
So think about this: though I did receive some negative comments about my bleached light brown hair, I have also received compliments about how pretty it was when it was grown out naturally. So the real question was, what was I going to choose to believe? It was my "not good enough" self image that was the reason why I resorted to bleaching my hair in the first place. It is unwise to compare yourself to others. You should strive to be the best version of yourself you can. The more you care for yourself and your hair, the more confident you will become and the more people will notice.